Bracing for the weekend

[Annaka]

The weekends are the toughest for me. No matter how I try to stay busy, I just can't escape the weekend wave of emotions or the inevitable disagreement with my stbx that starts sometime on Saturday and runs through Sunday night.  I've taken a lot of the advice all of you have given me and it has all helped. However I am developing this "weekend dread" syndrome. He leaves soon so I hope that will take care of the arguing part but I'm guessing that it will be a while until the emotion waves subside.

Here's hoping this weekend will be different.

[odyssey]

I still hate weekends - always have. Everywhere I go on weekends I see couples everywhere and families spending time together. I always feel so left out. Being uncoupled and alone becomes so magnified.

Finding ways to keep busy isn't the problem, it's my awareness of everyone else around me.

[ollie]

Ditto

[H0$$]

It must be a "woman thing". Everywhere I go I see couples and say "poor bastard". 

[GA_Mike]

I remember the 'weekend dread'. Part of it is learning to be OK by yourself (easier said than done). Part of it is letting go of the notion that if you are not part of a couple, you are somehow a lesser person. That takes time to learn, but eventually you will start to enjoy the freedom to be who you want to be. Give it time, get support from your friends, spend time on HEO when you need to. That's what helped me make it through the weekends after my divorce from my first wife. Another thing, try to plan your weekends ahead of time, that way when Saturday hits you know how you will fill your time. Hang in there, it will get better.

[teddybear]

We must first learn how to love and appreciate ourselves.  I remember a post by Ho$$ that said something to the effect that the American society has been programmed with all of these love stories of what coupling should be . . . love is thrown in our faces everyday, movies, books, magazine, tv is telling us by rote of what love is supposed to be and how we are supposed to respond, yada yada yada.  Love yourself unconditionally and be comfortable within your own skin.  Don't get me wrong now, I want that sensation of being appreciated, loved, respected and gushed all over but my day will go on quite nicely because I have all I really need and that is me.  Ho$$, I do agree with you.  Geez, what's happening to me .

[Annaka]

I hear all of you and I'm taking it all in. I'm trying...and with perseverance and a positive attitude, I'll get there. I'm trying to shift my focus and figure out what I want to do, in this moment. I'm writing this at 3:00p central time on Saturday, November 7th, and so far, I've had a pretty good day. And that is in spite of the fact that my stbx and his gf are out right now deciding on which house they will be renting. He's moving next week...I suppose I'll be happy when it's all said and done but this transition time is tough. I can't deny it. I'm staying in our house until after the holidays. I'll be happy to move after the new year rolls in but I just can't bring myself to do it any time before that.

Staying strong, for now.

[Wolfy]

Anna

You're doing fantastic. Not everyday is going to be great right now for you. But you're showing a positive attitude and looking toward the future. You are not letting your stbx control you. You are well on your way.

[Annaka]

Thank you Wolfy. I really need all of the encouragement I can get right now so I appreciate your kind words.

[Annaka]

Hit a little bump in the road this afternoon but all-in-all got through the day fairly well (with some very encouraging words from Sluggo... thank you my friend ).  I'm taking some of Wolfy's advice from last week and am listening to some good music right now (Stevie Ray Vaughan... Change It, Texas Flood, Pride and Joy). It's all ok for now.

[Sluggo]

  
Annaka,
I was rockin some SRV today too ! I even went out and bought a new Ipod dock, because my laptop wasn't loud enough !
SRV Rocks !
I always feel better with a good dose of the Blues ! Good for you, Annaka.

Sluggo

[Annaka]

Music really is a magical elixir. I listened to SRV, ZZ Top and Roy Orbison last night and probably had it a bit too loud. But I felt happy. Washed away any earlier sadness of the day

[BamaJan]

I still hate weekends - always have. Everywhere I go on weekends I see couples everywhere and families spending time together. I always feel so left out. Being uncoupled and alone becomes so magnified.

Finding ways to keep busy isn't the problem, it's my awareness of everyone else around me.

Exactly.

[Annaka]

It's Sunday night, 8:00p central time. No drama today . I'm so happy. First time in months that this has happened.

Sending good thoughts to all of you.

[teddybear]

Good to hear Annaka, very good indeed.