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Author Topic: Just Venting?  (Read 354 times)
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« on: February 24, 2012, 02:23:56 PM »

If you feel like venting about something, you might want to think again ...

Ex-husband gets choice of jail or a Facebook apology   http://www.usatoday.com/news/nation/story/2012-02-23/facebook-apology-divorce-jail/53221786/1

Man Ordered to Apologize to Wife for Facebook Comment   http://www.pcmag.com/article2/0,2817,2400701,00.asp

I think this raises some really interesting issues ... but if you don't want to face years of court on a first amendment battle, be careful how and where you vent about stuff.

... and if you do it here, make dang sure you don't provide any identifiable information.
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AKA Betsy Braddock
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odyssey says "Think good thoughts"


« Reply #1 on: February 24, 2012, 03:08:27 PM »

We've had more than one ex-spouse/STBX follow people around here at HEO and gather info -

"Social Media" such as facebook can be a useful tool for confirming an estranged spouse's location (avoiding subpoena or non-payment of child support)
or for uncovering personal details (extramarital relationships, business connections)
or for confirming suspicious/fraudulent activity.

I know of several employers who check to see if potential hires have objectionable content in a prospective employee's facebook page - they refuse to hire an otherwise qualified applicant based on what they perceive from publicly available reference.

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« Reply #2 on: February 24, 2012, 04:58:47 PM »

The last 2 people I hired I checked out on facebook and I also googled them. I personally do not facebook but I use a friend's account to "creep" potential hires....even if people have their setting so they only "share" with "friends" there are ways of getting in to see their content.

I think it's akin to walking down a street and taking your clothes off when I look at the extent to which some people "share"...it's actually kind of disturbing in my view. It's a pretty small world...even if someone's not purposely looking for information on you.

A new younger person I recently hired literally ran into me on at an outdoor celebration...they were quite intoxicated and proceeded to say a few things that I personally took as funny and laughed off but with another boss it could potentially have meant the job or at least being scrutinized more than before in their worklife. Facebook's the same way...you think it's somewhat private but you never know who's watching.

I try to be reasonably careful here but given this warning I think there's stuff I might want to delete...and certainly I need to be more careful.
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m_t
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« Reply #3 on: February 24, 2012, 09:02:05 PM »

People often wonder why I don't post much of anything regarding my ex/our divorce. Well... Back in the day, I was stupid and posted too much info. And someone here (well, no longer here. I think.) contacted my ex. I was issued a restraining order prohibiting me from posting about our divorce. So yes, it can happen.

It is wise to be careful what you post.
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Fuck Cancer

"Women are angels. When someone breaks our wings, we simply continue to fly. On a broomstick. We are flexible."

Children aren't coloring books. You don't get to fill them in with your favorite colors.
The Kite Runner, Khale
HarleyQuinn
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Hi Puddin'! Miss me?


« Reply #4 on: February 25, 2012, 02:20:29 AM »

We've had more than one ex-spouse/STBX follow people around here at HEO and gather info -
Yes we have..

... and if you do it here, make dang sure you don't provide any identifiable information.
That is true, but something also to consider is your screen name, make sure it isn't something that an ex/stbx would recognize or figure out.
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allbusiness
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« Reply #5 on: February 25, 2012, 05:08:04 PM »

Okay, stating it is TMI on the internet is one person's/your personal opinion. Who gets to determine what is "too much" for someone else?

Also, I would really be curious to see just what comments he posted. Are they in the articles? I didn't read the articles, but had seen this story on a TV news program a few days ago.

I, myself, think this ruling is outrageous. If it is stating bald face lies...that can be proven...maybe consequences are due. However, I see no reason to punish someone if they are just stating the facts or their feelings about an issue in *their* life.
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InDenial
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« Reply #6 on: February 27, 2012, 05:40:20 PM »

A big issue with Facebook is that most people use their real names.  I don't know any specifics of what he posted on Facebook, but we could speculate that it might fall under libel law. Assuming she's not a public figure, it would be illegal in many states for him to publish false things that are damaging to her reputation. (If she's a public figure, he would be in trouble if he KNOWINGLY published things that are false.)

On this site, everyone I can think of is using a pseudonym.  So it would be hard for our Exes to claim we are libeling them.
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m_t
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« Reply #7 on: February 28, 2012, 09:14:45 AM »

... and if you do it here, make dang sure you don't provide any identifiable information.

VERY important point. Do NOT post anything you would not say to the judge's face. Trust me - there is a reason why I do not go into details about my ex, our divorce, etc. It is not a hell of a lot of fun to try explaining a vent to the judge deciding your custody case.

And it may not even be your ex - someone else may decide to "level the playing field". That raises all sorts of other issues. Trust me on that one, too. I didn't know who the heck I could trust here for a long time. And sometimes I still wonder.

ETA: Forgot I already replied to this thread. But sometimes it's an issue worth reinforcing! Wink
« Last Edit: February 28, 2012, 11:04:23 AM by m_t » Logged

Fuck Cancer

"Women are angels. When someone breaks our wings, we simply continue to fly. On a broomstick. We are flexible."

Children aren't coloring books. You don't get to fill them in with your favorite colors.
The Kite Runner, Khale
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