Collaborative Divorce Blah Blah Blah

Here’s another article about Collaborative Divorce, this one from the Fort Wayne Indiana News Sentinel. Collaborative Divorce is a loose term that describes a more collegial appropach to divorce. Typically, it involves attorneys and their clients spending some time meeting alone with each other and then some time meeting with the other side. It makes frequent use of other disciplines, including accountants, financial planners, therapists, and coaches.

Divorce lawyers love Collaborative Divorce, and in a weird, twisted way, they have a point. Collaborative Divorce is a great alternative to adversarial divorce, and for the roughly 25% of us who would otherwise be stuck in that rut, any approach that allows us to work out problems rather than doing battle in court to resolve them is a good thing. It makes less sense for the other three fourths of us, the “silent majority” if you will, who are either too poor, or too smart, or both, to get caught up in all this nonsense.

For this majority, the distinguishing feature of Collaborative Divorce is not its collaborative nature; we’re already doing that now, thank you. The distinguishing feature of Collaborative Divorce, with its multiple meetings, sessions, and documentation, is its high cost, in many cases approaching the cost of a typical adversarial divorce.

For most of us, Collaborative Divorce is a good way to send the children of lawyers, accountants, financial planners, coaches, and therapists to college. It’s not a smart way to get divorced. Better to work out the details, do an uncontested divorce to get through the pain, and quietly move on with our lives.